Thanks James and I B for sharing, my sympathies to you too and sadly it seems to be on the increase; the number of my colleagues who are going through or have gone through this is alarming. There was the odd occasion that I can look back on and find some comedy. My Mum was still driving in the earlier stages but only locally. The local Asda was left turn out of the road, left again at the traffic lights, then left into Asda’s car park. The journey home was left out of the car park, left at the traffic lights, left at the next lights and then left back into her road, so basically just going round the block. One time, she gone shopping but couldn’t remember where she’d parked the car so she got a shopping trolley attendant to help her look for it. Two more people from the shop floor joined in the search and then the manager as well (big car park), Eventually they decided to get a taxi to take her home and there it was, in the garage, she’d walked there…
My Mum used to listen to the radio quite a lot before she became unwell so I got her a Pure DAB radio to use in the kitchen but she never used it except if either my sister or I would put it on when we were there.
As many on here will be aware just under 12 months ago I lost my wife of 35 years. I’ve been through phases since then. Sometimes listening to music night after night, other times just reading.
Levelling out now I think.
Regards,
Lindsay
Music has been part of my life for as long as I can remember, mum doing housework to the likes of Housewives Choice, ironing to recordings from musicals. Dad and his brass bands. Being taken to a Gilbert Briggs demonstration.
As I got older I developed tinnitus and left side deafness so large scale sound such as concert hall and cinema was painful. The last cinema visit was the final episode of Lord of the Rings.
Then, my employer decided to turn our top performing office into a call centre. Eight hours a day with headphones clamped to your head was pure hell, it got to the point of watching TV with subtitles only.
In 2012 our son died, another kind of hell. After a while we would do anything to get out, being where people were. For the first time in a few years we went to the Bristol Show where Nigel Finn spent time with us talking about music, doing the headphone demo. He got serious brownie points for including my wife, talking to her as an individual. There was a comic element to this, dearly beloved is 4 foot 10 and deafer than me…
He rekindled our interest in music, recorded and going to small scale concerts. Music to some extent gave us our life back.
Given the emotional content of some of the postings here (which I very much respect) I do feel slightly deferential posting my own experience which, in contrast, is very simple and straightforward. This is not so much about stopping listening to music but, rather, about an exponential increase in listening.
At the beginning of September 2017 my Uniti Nova and NAS were installed. Prior to that my music collection (99% classical) had been on CDs—plus a few downloads in readiness for arrival of the Nova and NAS. It may sound crazy to say how much the ability to play music from the sofa—rather than wandering across the room to find a CD…and then try to remember how to program the CD player—revolutionised my music listening, but I played very much more music after that. (Of course, I also delighted in a large number of high resolution downloads, too.)
The second, and more recent, revolution has been installation of Roon (which I mentally pooh-poohed for a long time). That. too, has substantiailly increased the amount of music I play. It’s so easy to queue and play some individual short pieces when there’s only a short time to listen.
The third revolution—between the Nova and Roon revolutions—was buying a Mu-so and having that in the bedroom. Classical music before sleep has been singularly therapeutic!
Sorry for standing the topic on its head, to some extent.
Stephen
I don’t think apologies are needed. This is a great thread.
I’ve had periods usually around depression or poor health where music just couldn’t get me out of a bad frame of mind. This past year with skin cancer issues and the chaos of Dr visits I just didn’t want to fiddle with the TT. the LP would finish but my mind so preoccupied it was a waste of energy, I did listen to it as background RP or my local Classical station. I had 3 oncologists say" it’s too far gone just get hospice" ,that really set me back figuring how to live, I did get to a hospital that does these surgeries all the time but several cancelled operations later I’m still focussing on an operation at great research teaching hospital, so I’ll have my music to help me heal. Time will tell. I’d love to get back to that period where I can get a thrill with the details and carried away by a great performance.
Hoping this does not come across wrongly: hang in there, and may music help you through these most difficult times.My thoughts are with you, and anyone facing similar challenges. I have no doubt that one way or another one day that will be me.
Thank you Bystander, it sure has been a lesson in patience, frustration and letting go. Music has always been a favorite diversion as well as film.I try to use it as a meditation to get my mind off my problems. I go 2 hours to the coast and stay with cousin who will go with me to see the new surgeon, amazing thing is she looks a lot like my mother, even the hand movements. I go to a men’s group and they can’t believe the roller coaster ride I’ve had for the past year. sure has been an education in health and bio science.
Lost an interest in music when my mum died and must have been several years before got back again. Sadly lost my brother suddenly last week and finding the music so therapeutic tonight.
My sympathies Jeff, I hope the music keeps working.
Deepest sympathies Jeff, glad to read music is helping you through this…
I don’t think I have ever stopped listening to music since my schooldays. I have changed my tastes over the years and now listen to so many genres. My only problem is getting time to listen to all the music I want to hear.
When my marriage ended seven years ago I moved in to a small flat while the former marital home was up for sale but ended up living in that flat for 5.5 years. During that time my hifi, records and CDs were in storage so all I had to listen to was an iTunes library on my computer through a little pair of Harman Kardon computer speakers. Didn’t buy or listen to much music during that time as it sounded so awful.
Fast forward 7 years, new partner, new house and a massively upgraded hifi and let’s just say I’m making up for lost time in both listening and buying.
What a moving thread.
Anyway, I think I have listened fairly consistently over the years. There are often days where I don’t fancy listening, but I tend to pick up my guitar on those days. Generally I go back to my records after a day or two. No big breaks as far as I recall.
Stu
Indeed it is, far more so than I anticipated in asking the question. In my case, too, no breaks (I don’t count the odd week or two where simply being busy has stopped me, nor during a house renovation where for I had to seal up everything fro a couple of months to protect it from dust, as I do not regard that as stopping listening, rather it was being prevented for clearly identifiable good reason.
Regarding traumatic events, I have always felt that music is the one thing that I would (and have in the past) turned to with vigour as something to help me deal with it. However some of the very specific instances cited in this thread that themselves had a link with music listening are special cases that in respoect of which I suspect none of us who have not been through the same thing can predict with confidence how we ourselves would react.
I can not think to be live without music, irregardless of the fidelity level of my system. And even regardless of my mental state…, music will be always in my live…
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