Best jokes

[StuW]

That’s brightened up my night!!!

[Svetty]

Yup, there is no hope, only death…

[suzywong]

@Svetty

there is no hope, only death…

…and taxes.

OTOH there is also alcohol!

[Svetty]

Indeed, I get by with a little help from my friends - Sangiovese and Grenache

[Debs]

Thanks to google maps I’ve discovered Eric Burdon was right:
There is a house in New Orleans!

[Beachcomber]

Never trust a fart

[Rod_Smith]

[swinnerton]

[HouseholdNaim]

Hi Swinnerton. Would you mind not posting Matt’s daily cartoon pls? It’s one of the more enjoyable bits of working through that (and various other) newspapers, taking in the headlines then the light relief of Matt.

Sarah Kennedy used to do it on her early show on R2, describing that day’s cartoon. Enough listeners asked her to stop and she did.

Thanks ever so.

Anyone that wants to see it can do so at The Telegraph website - it’s not paywalled, only the articles are (and my discontinued sub still allows me full access till I clear the relevant cookies.)

[Elkman70]

Hi Swinnerton,

Please ignore Household Naim. I like to see the Matt cartons here.

[CBR600]

Me too, keep posting

[HouseholdNaim]

@HouseholdNaim

Anyone that wants to see it can do so at The Telegraph website - it’s not paywalled

Is it that difficult?

[CBR600]

Why should I and others be pressed to go to a telegraph web site.

I read the times.

Quite happy seeing the cartoons here on the jokes thread

[Pete.T]

[Beachcomber]

I expect you’re wondering why I’ve called you all here today.

[Beachcomber]

Good Woman

[TOBYJUG]

[raym55]

[swinnerton]

[TheKevster]

Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger were discussing who they were going to play in their new Hollywood blockbuster The Great Composers!

“I wanna be Beethoven,” said Stallone.

“I gotta be Mozart,” added Willis.

“What about you, Arnie?” they asked…