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At the first school I worked at, we had an English teacher called William Shakespeare. Apparently, it was a family tradition to name boys William, though not necessarily for them to end up teaching English.
The most extraordinary example I came across was a fellow undergraduate who was Scottish, and had the fine Scottish surname Kerr. His parents had decided to give him the fine Scottish name Ewan. But, apparently, not checked how those two names worked together. Poor chap.
Mark
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What do you do when a bird shits on your car?
Dump her. She’s taking liberties.
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Reading ?
Yes, I lived there from 1984 until 2020. The best thing about it was how easy it was to get somewhere else. There were some nice pubs in the countryside around it, London and Oxford were handy for concerts and the Hexagon wasn’t bad, if a trifle unadventurous where classical music was concerned. You just had to look at Bracknell and Slough to appreciate how fortunate you were in Reading. The Nags Head was still good last time I was there too.
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There was a kid in my local tennis club called Ulick McGee. There are at least three people on LinkedIn with that name.
I don’t know how parents do this. When our kids were born and we were choosing names, the last step was to run the candidate names by my brother in law, who would reliably surface every conceivable playground insult that could be attached to any name or name combination.
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When I worked in my insurance companies Canterbury sub office in 1978 I was rarely desperate to shut it & leave at 5.00pm.
However one day I was & was therefore annoyed when a character, who looked like Bolton’s famous steeplejack, Fred Dibnah, walked in at 4.55pm & asked me to note that he had changed his van. This would have been a quick process where I looked up his paper file, noted the change & told my main branch the following morning.
“Certainly sir, what’s your name?” I asked.
“Fred Blogg” he replied.
“I’m sorry, I need to leave on time & haven’t got time for jokes today. What is your name?”.
“Fred Blogg” he said again.
I asked a couple more times, clearly losing my temper, but continued to get the same, polite reply.
In exasperation, & by now well past 5.00pm, I sighed & thought I would humour him by going to the ‘B’ record binder to search for the obviously false name. I started to thumb through the binder & was horrified to find a record for ‘Frederick Blogg’.
If ever I have wanted the ground to open up & swallow me it was then. I gave Mr Blogg the most grovelling apology I have ever given & noted the change of vehicle on the record.
He politely thanked me for noting the change, & left the office totally oblivious to how rude I had been towards him!
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I was at Luton Airport many years ago when an announcement came over the tannoy:
“Would Mr Hugh Janus please come to Reception.”
I assume that the tannoy speaker had not spotted that she was being set up.
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Not a silly name but I used to play Cricket with a guy whose Surname was Kuerten. When he dropped a catch or similar, there were shouts of " FFS Kuerten, pull yourself together.
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In one of the hospitals I trained at the person who ran the mortuary was called Dawn. Obviously she was known as ‘Dawn of the Dead’
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Had a small flat in Slough, burgled twice, mugged once*
Not a nice place to live, now live deep in the Berkshire countryside, miles away from Slough
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Policeman “You were very shaken, I hope you don’t mind me saying, but I didn’t think you stood a chance of picking him out in the i.d. parade”
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Me " I couldn’t pick him out"
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Policeman " Then how did you pick him out?"
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Me ‘’ He was wearing the same clothes as when he mugged me "
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I remember a technical expert at the BBC whose surname was Bell. He was very confident in his leadership, so to speak, and maybe didn’t ever discover that he was known by his staff and colleagues as “the Bell that cannot be told”.
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Did he come to a sticky end? 
That one once got past a good friend of mine too, a senior sub-editor. Poor guy. it went into print on the letters page.
As a retired senior sub, I feel his pain. I’m the idiot who put through “Flordida” in a 60 pt. headline. On a Page One story. In a Florida newspaper!
This happened much more in my last few years, which is what happens when you cut staff and work without a safety net.
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As a GP and New Zealand I have looked after Julie Andrews, Josephine Baker, Lloyd Cole and James Bond. There was a local sex therapist called Joan Lust and a urologist called Rod Studd.
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Oh this one is just going to keep on giving on Sky Sports F1…’I thought Mike Crack may be suffering after last night’s birthday celebrations…’
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When I was in the RAF, I had a colleague whose surname was Fallis. For some reason his parents thought an appropriate forename would be Richard - forevermore known as D*ck Fallis. You couldn’t make it up.
*Forum rules prevented me from typing his actual name - but it’s not Duck!
I also had a colleague whose surname was Gorringe, nicknamed “Britvic”. Perfect.
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Near where I live - they have built a McCarthy and Stone complex … opposite the undertakers .
What they failed to build was an ambulance bay, for the ambulance that seems to permanently there
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Another contender in the name stakes is the umpire at today’s All England badminton - Freek Cox.