Best jokes

God that’s almost as bad as

What’s brown, lies in a field and sounds like a bell?

dung

1 Like

In my Town High Street there’s nothing but opticians, chemists & bakeries;

It’s all specs, drugs & sausage rolls!

17 Likes

But not quite, Baldric

1 Like

DC5C36B0-5242-44F5-A0E2-967B641F7655-5691-000005B5E12C3940

19 Likes

Tobs, that’s not West End… must be Suburbia.

3 Likes

“I really should have listened to the advice my old grandpa gave me."

“Why - what advice did he give you?”

“I don’t know - I didn’t listen.”

6 Likes

steve

16 Likes

either way it’s a sin

1 Like

VAR-dy

Vardy

5 Likes

At the risky of causing controversy what can you say about somebody whose parents can’t even spell her name properly…

I do whatever the voices in my wife’s head tell me to do.

4 Likes

IIRC that spelling is the original English translation in the Old Testament so is technically more correct than the more common modern version.

Don’t you just hate it when your fingers go through the toilet paper.
But I still enjoy working in the old peoples home!

1 Like

Stolen from Viz. Who said it’s not as funny as it used to be?

6 Likes

Thanks to the Tiger Lilies again. I’ll let him know when I put his food out this evening.

4 Likes

Thanks to the other place …

6 Likes

Spotted in a Waterstones window display

13 Likes

9 Likes

Discounted?

1 Like

:small_blue_diamond:So True…

/Peder🙂

12 Likes