Thanks to my local town FB page for this.
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That word “years” seems odd.
Either it should be “year” or have an apostrophe “year’s” … I think !
But I’ll wait a while before I flag it up for moderation …
Years ago I my mother asked if I wanted anything whilst she was out shopping I replied some deodorant please.
She asked if I wanted the ball type to which I said no thanks I want it for under my arms?
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Or to use the classic lines from a Not the Nine O’clock News skit:
‘Ball or aerosol’
‘Neither, I want it for my armpits’
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Not that I adhere to any diet, but this contribution from the Tiger Lilies’ FB page tickled my fancy as I wade through cold cuts of ham and beef.
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I just accept that excess munching comes with the season.
G
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I’m not expecting this to last long.
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A husband and wife are lying quietly in bed after a romantic night out & a long long session of love making
The wife looks over at him and asks … What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?
Definitely not!
Why not? Don’t you like being married?
Of course I do. OK, OK I’ll might get married again.
Would you live in our house?
Sure, it’s a great house.
Would you sleep with her in our bed?
Where else would we sleep?
Would you let her drive my car?
Probably, it is almost new.
Would you give her my jewellery?
No, I’m sure she’d want her own.
Would you take her golfing with you?
Yes, those are always good times.
Would she use my clubs?
No, she’s left-handed.
…. silence
Sh#t !!!
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One really should mind their own business
I was walking past a mental hospital the other day and I could hear them yell 12… 12… 12… I was curious to see what was going on, the fence was way to high to see over so eventually I found a gap and peaked through. Some idiot poked in the eye with a stick and immediately they started shouting 13…13…13.
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Native Australians were the first to develop the six pack muscle in their belly;
Ab originals
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I have a six pack.
Three under each armpit.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one - and let the other one off.
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'My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.
Well, we’ll see about that!
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There was a guy who entered a local paper’s pun contest…
He sent in ten different puns in the hope that at least one pun would win.
Unfortunately no pun in ten did.
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Help! I’m playing Scrabble with Midge Ure.
I’ve only got 4 letters left, but they mean nothing to me: OVNR
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