The solution is to bake her a cake.
Even if you can’t bake.
Especially if you can’t bake.
1 Like
Honestly, I can’t beat Ravvie’s suggestion above.
The eggs, the sugar, the butter and the flour yes, but not that suggestion!
2 Likes
I yelled COW at a woman on a bicycle yesterday.
She sneered at me and gave me the finger, then rode straight into the cow …
21 Likes
Before I got married, I hadn’t realised that “What do you want to watch?” was a rhetorical question.
6 Likes
I found £18.97 in a hat today on the floor near Asda. I thought the bloke stood near it might have picked it up but he just had his eyes closed and seemed far more interested in playing his violin.
9 Likes
In a similar vein I once presented my wife with a lovely bunch of flowers and she was right made up about it, then mysteriously her mood changed when I told her it was no problem, there are loads tied to a lamp post just by the roundabout.
Wimmen eh? Can’t live with em, can’t live with em.
2 Likes
In marriage, you need to know which hand towels you can use, and which ones are for the better people who visit your wife’s home.
3 Likes
Someone got an old 1,000 adult jokes book for Christmas 
4 Likes
Commentators nightmare here.
Hamilton, Hamilton and Hamilton start for Arbroath against Hamilton, while Hamilton also have a Hamilton in their starting lineup.
8 Likes
Like the 1991 Japanese Grand Prix…
The Brabham team’s two drivers were
Brundle and Blundell
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You missed off Jamie Hamilton
who plays for Hamilton.
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Makes an announcer’s ‘Forfar 5, East Fife 4’ look like a stroll in the park!
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Borrowed from a shipmate.
6 Likes
He does gets a mention…
Hopefully he doesn’t get booked for fowling a non-Hamilton Hamilton.
2 Likes
Reminds me of a Monty Python sketch: “Pratt plays a long ball to Pratt, back to Pratt…”
2 Likes
I bought an LP of wasp sounds and tried it out on the Michell this afternoon. It was terrible and not at all what I was expecting, nothing like wasps. Looked a little closer, my fault, I’d been listening to the bee side.
10 Likes
