Why do elephants paint their testicles red?
So they can hide in cherry trees!
What is the loudest noise in the jungle?
Monkeys picking cherries!
8 Likes
A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley
motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The
surgeon was there waiting for the service manager to come take a look
at his bike when the mechanic shouted across the garage, “Hey Doc,
can I ask you a question?”
The surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to where the mechanic was
working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his
hands on a rag and asked, “So Doc, look at this engine. I open its
heart, take**the valves out, repair any damage, and then put them back in,*and when
I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary
and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically
the same work?”
The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the
mechanic…
"Try doing it with the engine running!’
26 Likes
The BBC is reporting this morning that the woman darts player Fallon Sherrock “came from behind” to throw a double that won her the PDC World Darts Championship.
Surely she must have come from behind otherwise she would have had darts sticking out of her back?
1 Like
I did read somewhere that they have adopted a more hands on approach to customer service.
2 Likes
Ah, I remember Chelsea in the early ‘90’s, when all Neil Shipperley held in his hands was his own future.
3 Likes
Last night the front doorbell rang and my boy rushed off to answer it, he ran back in saying Dad, Dad there’s a man at the door with a bald head! I said, tell him I’ve already got one…
6 Likes
Wouldn’t it be nice if, this year, Chris Rea’s family came to visit him instead?
10 Likes
Northerners have just started boiling their Brussels sprouts ready for the big day.
4 Likes
Blasphemy!!
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5 year olds and 50 year olds are both looking forward to having a new bike for Christmas.
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It appears somebody has found my joke offensive
I thought it was funny but I had to explain it to my wife!
Best
David
Thank you David, there are two other Jesus cartoon jokes posted on here by Toby Jug and Paper Plane which appear to be ok.
I too thought it was funny. There has been too much PC crap in the U.K. lately. Hopefully this might now start to change.
4 Likes
I unfortunately didn’t get to see it, religion like politics seems to a touchy subject.
1 Like