Unusual definition.
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Works better if you replace Manchester with Salford, and add that the earthquake did thousands of pounds worth of improvements.
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See correction above.
I was robbed by six dwarves today. Not Happy!
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Try meditation. It’s better than sitting around doing nothing.
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A new machine came to market, one that slaps those who lie. A father decides this could be of some use, and purchases one to take home.
A little while later, the school principal calls, telling him his son skipped school. Outraged, the father confronts his son, “Son! Where were you during school hours today?”
The son replies, “At school!” to which the machine slapped him. “Ow! Okay I lied I was at the movies.”
Furious, the dad asks, “Which one?”
Mark replies, “Harry Potter.” He’s slapped again and says, “FINE it was a R18 movie.”
Surprised the dad exclaims, “At your age I would have never done something like that!” The machine slaps the dad.
Watching it all unfold, the mother comes in laughing, and chimes in saying, “No surprise there, after all he is your son.” The machine gives her a slap.
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Yes
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Or does Richard Gere look like that dog?
And with less punctuation by the looks of it… 
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In August 2022 I started a thread on this forum called " Anyone in the UK getting any Rain", this was my first post:
“We have had nothing recently. They keep forecasting it but it doesn’t happen. Regards from a dry Worcestershire.”
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Turn off the rain please - William is coming to England 
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