Best jokes

Gives the concept of not entering a new meaning…

11 Likes

I notice that the apple laptop didn’t get into heaven either!

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I’d say that laptop is the tool used to guard the gate.

5 Likes

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

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The Firewall?

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Non vegetarian cookbooks are just variants of the necro-nom-nom-nom-icon.

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I hope that is not real!!! :open_mouth:

1 Like

A friend who is from York sent me this just now.

18 Likes

And it’s 100% accurate, speaking as an absolute legend. :innocent:

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Seconded as another absolute hero.

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As a naturalised absolute legend, I agree with most of it but, being married to a Scot, I would take issue with one section.

steve

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Know what, you’re absolutely right.

Speaking as an (almost) naturalised absolute legend, originally frae north o’ the border, but with a partner who is a natural born and bred absolute legend, I hadn’t thought things through carefully enough.

Smack round the head avoided at the last possible minute … … … phew.

3 Likes

I live in Southampton…I can walk to Waitrose…

6 Likes

We are in the same Wazzocks region but a little further north so …
…Yep, we can walk to Waitrose as well, but have to pass Sainsbury’s on the way.

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As an inbred Lancashire man living the land of wazzocks…
Q. How do you kill a Yorkshireman?
A. Slam the seat down when he’s drinking.
I thank you… :slight_smile:

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