Best jokes

18 Likes

With hearing that good, I’m sure that beer will lead smoothly into a long rambling debate about vinyl vs digital.

Mark

6 Likes

“Daddy, I’m afraid of zombies”
“Zombies aren’t real, they’re just people with makeup”
“Just like Mummy”
“Yep, just like Mummy”

14 Likes

I took my granddad to one of those places where the little fish nibble off the dead skin.

Bit messy, and took a while.

But a lot cheaper than an actual funeral.

15 Likes

15 Likes

HAVE YOU GOT SEX INSURANCE.

You can now get sex insurance in the UK so make sure you get correct insurance for the sex you are having. Please find a list of companies below catering for most tastes:

Sex with your wife - legal and general.

Sex on the telephone - direct line.

Sex with your partner-standard life.

Sex with someone different - go compare.

Sex with a lady of generous proportions -more than.

Sex on the back seat of a car - Sheila’s wheels.

Sex with a prostitute - commercial Union.

Sex with your maid -employers liability.

Sex with an oap - saga .

Sex resulting in pregnancy - general accident.

Sex with animals - National Farmers Union.

Sex with a monk- Abbey Life

Sex with Navy Officers- Admiral Group.

AND FINALLY

Sex with a transvestite - confused. Com

Make sure you are adequately covered

24 Likes

Puerile :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

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< nerdy wine joke alert : on >

Posh & Bocks

< nerdy wine joke alert : off >

9 Likes

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27 Likes

I trust the R-C was consumed “ in a manner befitting its status” before being turned into a lamp stand! :laughing:

1 Like

It was definitely consumed, although many years ago. Mmmmm.

4 Likes

I like that one.

Sweet dreams are made of cheese,
who am I to diss a Brie,
I Cheddar the world and the Feta cheese,
everybody’s looking for Stilton

15 Likes

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Market Analyst n:
A person who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn’t happen today.

4 Likes

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1 Like

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