Best jokes

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IMG_2971

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Should post that one in here. :rofl:

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I know you are supposed to exercise, and I did try jogging once, but it made the wine jump right out of the glass.

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:sunglasses:

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Found this whilst out walking this morning, so if anyone has lost an elastic band, please get in touch.

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From this week’s Private Eye

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Did you make that up all on your own or did you get your wife to help you?

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Found it elsewhere :smiley::bike:

Spelling rules.
I before E
Except when your foreign neighbour Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty caffeinated weightlifters. Weird.

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Cut open an avocado. Yet another wooden ball. Would it hurt the makers of avocados to put in a different toy once in a while?

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Did you know? By replacing potato crisps with grapefruit as a snack you can lose up to 90% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

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Never believe what an American sandwich tries to tell you.

It’s always full of baloney.

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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

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They suggest you should slow down.

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Friends of Brian Giddins, lifelong steam railway enthusiast gathered to mark his passing earlier today.

Unfortunately Brian was run over by a class 4-6-0 engine on the nearby historic railway. ‘It’s how Brian would have wanted to go’, said his best friend Derek, ‘In fact he was chuffed to bits’.

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That would be something that I could use when I sneeze.

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